# Wild About Math!Making Math fun and accessible

12Nov/0712

## Need an excuse for not having done your Math homework?

Computer Scientist, Ph.D. Mathematician, and International Math Olympics Gold Medalist Tanya Khovanova has a nice page of unique Math humor.

What caught my attention, in particular, was her list of 10 reasons her kids have given for not doing their Math homework. Even if you don't understand the higher Math behind some of the jokes you should still get a chuckle out of them.

1. I had a constant amount of homework. I tried to derive its purpose, but I got nothing.
2. I assumed that all the homework you assigned me was Abelian, so I thought that I could pass it in and then do it.
3. I could only get arbitrarily close to my textbook, but I could never reach it.
4. I am sure that I put it inside my Klein Bottle last night, but this morning I could not find it.
5. I locked it in my trunk, but a four-dimensional dog got in and ate it.
6. My little sister cut it into a finite number of pieces, and when I put it back together, I got a proof of the Banach-Tarski Paradox.
7. I did part of it; the part I have left to do, is 0.999999999...
8. My homework is a constructive demonstration of Godel's Incompleteness Theorem. That is, it is possible to assign a homework that cannot be completed.
9. I wanted to, but I couldn't find its Godel Number.
10. I completed my homework, but then I beheld it and saw that it lacked character, personality - there was no "me" in it, so I multiplied it by i, and it became imaginary!

Slightly off topic, but also quite funny, is also a list of 7 reasons her kids have given for not having done their Physics homework.

1. I accidentally mixed my homework with my antihomework, and it exploded.
2. The gravitational constant changed sign, and my homework flew away.
3. I tried to build a black hole in my bedroom, when my homework suddenly disappeared.
4. According to Newton's third law, for every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction. I was afraid of what my homework could do to me if I worked on it too hard.
5. My Biology homework ate my homework!
6. My Physics homework disintegrated into atoms and fell through my floor to say hello to my neighbors.
7. I can't go against conservation of energy and the minimal action principle.
1. When my teacher asked waht my excuse was for not having my homework this time, I said that I forgot the excuse at home along with my homework

2. When my teacher asked what my excuse was for not having my homework this time, I said that I forgot the excuse at home along with my homework

3. The excuses my students have for not having their homework usually start off with ” I swear I did it.’ Whenever I hear it, I swear that I’ll give them more homework:(

4. i just say my dog ate it its legend and it will stay legend even though i dont have a dog lmso!!!!(laughing my socks off)DUH!!!!

5. Dont say my dog ate it! everyone knows that and unless you dont have proof dont say it! just start crying and the teacher will leave you alone…or i forgot

6. I always say i forgot it at home

7. i always say i forgot it at home even though i didnt do it!!

8. First of all you have to become a good student and let the teacher know that you are a good student. Then when you don’t do your homework go up to her BEFORE class and let her know that you forgot to do it. Be truthful(: They always let you off easy .

9. All you haft to say is i was up tell 10:00 working on me homework and my (mom or dad or someone) seid go to bed and look tired !!!boom!!! And done

10. All you haft to say is i was up tell 10:00 working on me homework and my (mom or dad or someone) seid go to bed and look tired !!!boom!!! And done works ever time

11. Or you could say we got home late and i did not have a chancs to do it Or say you gave me to much homework and i did not whant to do it

12. My brother put my homework in my gerbils cage and my gerbil chewed it up and used it as bedding